Full time position available. Job location: Arkansas
Immediate opening: Antifa team leader position now available for energetic and dedicated leftist. Responsibilities to include being doxxed, made the butt of jokes, trolled, and outmaneuvered politically. Open to all 58 genders. Race open to negotiation. Job duties may require helping continue the growth and expansion of the ShieldWall Network through cooperating with Operation Newton’s Cradle.
Read more about your assignment here, if you are interested in the position.
Required skills include: infighting with other leftists, leaking the names of your supporters, showing your ass in public, a general lack of literacy, sending in ‘infiltrators’ who defect to result in your organization getting doxxed, covering up rapes of your supporters by other leftists, really lame rhetoric, and the cognitive dissonance ability to spew about how much you hate law enforcement while keeping them on speed dial when you get scared of shadows and things that go bump in the night. We ARE willing to help with some on the job training for the right, motivated applicant, however.
Benefits include being the topic of conversation at family get-togethers for something other than your Women’s Studies major and most recent suicide attempt after all of your relations are doxxed. Also, it’ll get you out of your parents’ house for a couple of weekends a month, which will make them happy and be good for your health, too. Plus, you’ll never have to worry about interacting with normies again. Win-win.
There has been an extremely high turnover rate for this position over the last three years, so we are looking for a team player who can form a long-term partnership with SWN for the long haul. Whether you are a Trotskyite, Maoist, Stalinist, Democratic Socialist, Anarchist, or just uneducated and confused, we are open minded about this potential professional relationship. Come be a part of making history, for as long as you can stand it, until you burn out and slink away into inactivity and obscurity, as well.
Apply at the next public ShieldWall Network event. References from Martin, Marvin, Drew, Josh, Harley, Cat, Twitchy, Ryan, or Micah or…even we can’t remember all of them who have come and gone…are beneficial but not required.
Oh, yeah…Solidarity!
Ralph Viola Jr.
That was hilarious.